While many have been pointing out the bad and ugly of the whisky industry lately in their 2017 summaries (prices, quality, fakes, lack of transparency and diversity…) , I feel like I need to do what I’m here for, and what this blog is all about in the first place: stay fucking positive (which has sometimes proved quite hard this year as you may have noticed reading my #WhatReallyGrindsMyGears series of articles) !
And as it’s also this time of the year where every publication will try to foresee the trends of the year to come, let me do just that as well, but as a stargazer gullible whisky dreamer ! (before anything, please note this is pure second degree humour ;))
So, let’s try to picture the utopian version of me reading the whisky information websites of the future, here are the headlines I’m coming across…
–> Lower prices for greater quality !
–> World Whisky gets well-deserved global recognition
–> “limited releases” and “craft” are now regulated by an official definition – a big win for the ever-growing war against marketing bullshit engaged by leading consumer organisation.
–> Scotch is making it back as Jim Murray’s N°1 this year !
–> Suntory and Nikka to bring back older age statements
–> People walk into high-end whisky bars and order mixed whisky-based drinks without receiving a patronizing look from the bar staff.
–> Whisky bloggers finally stop bitching on their counterparts.
Sorry, Whisky Pete, this isn’t against you 😉
–> Millennials stop being considered as an homogene marketing target by whisky brands
–> Remaining independent distilleries continue to thrive without needing financial help from the big firms.
–> Macallan releases a new range of below -£40 bottles called “Great Causes”. The series sees partnerships with Women Empowerement associations as well as organisations fighting for Transgender rights and Sea Sheperd. Of course, all profits are to be donated to charities fighting for those causes. At the end of the year, Macallan is even hosting the biggest charity Christmas dinner for the homeless in their recently-opened distillery 2.0.
–> Scientists create a cutting-edge fake-detecting technology device and send it for free to every whisky auction house in a huge trial scheme.
–> UK government sets up a Maximum Alcohol Unit Pricing to tackle Xmas-shopping-caused poverty.
–> After months of fierce debates throughout 2018, and in an effort to develop innovation (and fight against the expanding World Whisky category AKA the foreign demon), The Scotch Whisky Association and UK Parliament finally agree to amend The Scotch Whisky Regulations 2009 by allowing Scottish distilleries to use other wood types than oak when it comes to cask maturation.
Dream on, dream on, dream until your dreams come true !
Oh wait, wake up call… It’s 2018 and I just got asked if I ACTUALLY liked whisky…